Nothing can help you in life when you give up. Don’t research anything on the internet it’s designed to make you wanna die more. Because you will do it kill your soul then you will kill yourself. If you have to go then sit and pray to anything, the devil God the plants pray to the insects that bit you. Alone makes you crazy, I talk to myself, and I bleed. All I want is the same as you, to forget everything and not forget how much I hate being alive, I have no friends I don’t want any, I don’t see family I don’t want any. I won’t speak of power, who cares who wants it. As I slip away day by day in my thoughts I find I’m dying slowly. We hold on to life because we don’t know what’s going to happen. I just let it soak in, I don’t eat like I use to, I just let my stomach feed off of me, I don’t speak to anyone anymore, I just stare at them and pretend the voices is some eyrie soul telling me to end my life. I too fear he’ll, but as time passes I lose my state of thought, now I don’t even respond to pain like I use to. Anyone can say anything, truth is life is unfair, we just want to squeeze some false hope out of it. Even mustering words to be noticed doesn’t matter. It’s like I don’t know why I search for answers, when I know my heart wants nothing to do with life. Today I tied a noose and tried hanging myself. Reading comments after comment I see people are Great at motivating the lost. It has helped cope and pull me through the years but deep down inside something is unsettled, something is wiggling in the pit of my stomach and it makes me feel sick everyday. Before anyone thinks this person needs to see someone, I have been in therapy for years. The lessons on peoples behaviors and the way money has taken over every aspect of a persons life and defines how people act towards you.ĭont make my mistake to stop making money intentionally to see whose there for you, You may end up without anything and without anyone like I did.Īnyway death, Yeah Ive been looking for death for years. Friends, family, events etc but leave the lessons I learnt in place.
Thats a easy one for me, Erase everything. If I could erase my entire memory, what memories would I want to keep if I had a choice? Tired of memories and small triggers to past thoughts, Thats what gets me down and thinking how much better it would be if I could sleep and never wake up, Never open my eyes again and feel anything. This has been with me from such a young age and I am just tired of life in general. I have tried to kill myself before and want to die but want to die through the use of nembutal or any other "peaceful" means. The fight that was once there has faded, It abruptly disappeared a few years ago, surfaced recently and is fading once more. As the years have rolled on by, Life has got tougher.
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